Leaving emotions at the door isn’t always easy. With over a third of our lives spent at work, personal baggage inevitably creeps in. This blog offers quick, effective strategies for handling negative emotions on the job. Learn to acknowledge your feelings, set boundaries, confide in trusted colleagues, and model openness to support others.
Ever felt emotional at work? Congrats, you’re human! As sensitive beings, it is natural for us to feel deeply, but managing our feelings is essential, especially in a professional setting. While staying connected to our emotions is generally beneficial, certain situations require us to handle our emotions with extra care. Outbursts can arise from job-related pressures or personal issues spilling over into our professional lives. Here’s how to handle those inevitable moments when emotions show up at work.
Research reveals that the most common negative emotions at work are frustration, worry, anger, dislike, and unhappiness. Managing these feelings without letting them affect our demeanour or achievements is often viewed as a hallmark of true professionalism. However, expecting to suppress emotions entirely is simply unrealistic—we are not robots, after all. With over a third of our waking hours spent at work, it is hardly surprising that our jobs influence our mental health and that personal issues occasionally surface during work hours.
So, what ten effective methods can help manage negative emotions in a professional setting?
1. Acknowledge and embrace your emotions
Emotions matter! They are an undeniable part of all of us. Moreover, emotions do not cause problems; they help solve them. Listen to your body and ask, “What do I feel?” Is your heart racing or your muscles tense? Often, physical signs reveal inner feelings before we consciously identify them. Simply naming the emotion helps determine your needs and actions. Start with the four basics: happy, sad, angry, and afraid. Identifying these fundamental emotions helps you step back and avoid reacting impulsively.
2. Compartmentalisation
Compartmentalise negative emotions by leaving personal matters at home to maintain productivity and well-being at work. Set clear work boundaries, aim to complete tasks within work hours, and limit after-hours communication. When you stop working, fully disconnect from your job. Easier said than done, we know, but mindfulness and grounding techniques when you are caught up in your emotions can help you stay present and help you put aside daily anger, frustration, and unhappiness so that you can focus on what you are doing. Regularly release negative emotions to avoid buildup, such as incorporating after-work exercise to boost your mood and relieve physical tension or talking to someone about how you are feeling.
4. Cool down
Use the 10-second rule to manage anxiety, worry, frustration, and anger: when you feel your temper rising, take deep, slow breaths and count to 10 to recompose yourself. If possible, excuse yourself from the situation to gain some distance, but reassure the other party that you will return to address the matter. Consider taking a walk or listening to relaxing music to cool down. If you have a trusted colleague, share your feelings with them, as they can help you calm down.
5. Never reply or make a decision when angry
Research shows that anxiety impairs decision-making abilities. In today’s world of instant communication, it is all too easy to send a hasty email or text that you might regret. Rather, draft your response, then save it and revisit it the next day. Do not let negative emotions cloud your judgment. Instead, pause all communication until you have calmed down.
6. Establish and respect boundaries
When on holiday, don’t just be “out of office”—be “not working.” Use your vacation days as they are part of your compensation. Just as you wouldn’t return part of your salary, don’t sacrifice your time off. Your free time is important for your health: studies by the World Health Organization show that longer working hours increase the risk of heart attacks and strokes. On the other hand, while some company cultures encourage emotional openness, it is wise to respect professional boundaries. While company cultures encourage emotional openness, it is wise to respect professional boundaries to maintain a healthy and productive work environment. Balancing openness with professionalism ensures that personal feelings are shared appropriately, fostering trust and collaboration without compromising workplace decorum.
7. Sleep well
Managing emotions is much harder when we are tired. Both the quantity and quality of sleep impact our ability to regulate emotions. Prioritise good sleep to maintain emotional balance.
8. Know your triggers and your limits
Recognising what upsets or angers you allows you to stay calm and plan your response in advance, even anticipating the other party’s reaction. Additionally, if you know a particular person who stresses you out will be on a project, consider approaching the working dynamic differently to be able to work with them in a less stressful way, or if that isn’t possible for you, consider declining the assignment if possible. Your peace of mind and health are more important than any job.
9. Be respectful
Treat your colleagues as you wish to be treated. If someone is rude, don’t reciprocate. Remain gracious, firm, and assertive without becoming aggressive. Often, rude individuals will calm down when they see they are not getting a reaction from you. However, if you do have an emotional outburst, apologise immediately to the person and anyone who witnessed it. You don’t need to explain or be defensive, just a simple “I am sorry. I reacted badly” often makes a significant difference.
10. For Leaders: Create a supportive environment
If you are in a leadership position, you have the power – and duty – to set a supportive tone where colleagues feel comfortable sharing their thoughts. How you handle your own emotions can significantly impact the workplace climate and employee motivation. While many consider “suppressing” or “fully expressing” emotions as the only options, “regulating” them is the most effective approach. This involves reappraisal, or reassessing an emotional situation. Successful leaders manage and influence their team’s emotional states, starting with their own. To achieve this, they often apply the research-backed technique of reframing a problem as a challenge rather than a threat. This approach helps maintain focus and motivation while reducing stress.
Conclusion
Remember, your emotions at work are completely valid. However, how you respond to them is what makes the difference between a good and bad experience at work. Embrace your feelings, seek appropriate support, and strive for a balanced approach to your personal and professional life. If your emotions become overwhelming or interfere with your performance, it might be time to seek professional help. At NEOVIVA, our mental health experts can assist you in developing effective coping strategies and exploring any underlying issues to maintain your emotional well-being.
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